Sunday, 31 August 2014

The FOUR important questions successful people ask ... Part 1 - WHY?


Why is a perfectly good question.  It's always been a favourite of mine. In fact, it is often the first question that comes into my head, especially when I see same-old actions happening, or an average option to consider, or mediocre behaviour being accepted, or any illogical or inefficient process.  It's like an alarm bell goes off in my head dinging loudly:
Why? ... why keep doing it that way? ... why would I do that? ... why complicate things? ... why should I accept that?

OMG ... so many WHY questions come up for me as I write this blog. I've been WHY-ing since I was a kid. My Dad used to answer with ..."because I said so and that's good enough" ... or "because that's just the way it is or always has been" ... or "because that's the rules";  that was never good enough ... and never has been enough for me.

Now, I'm all for having some boundaries in life, and grateful in many ways that I had strict parents from which I gained high level ethics and good morals.  However, in all honesty, rules for me have always been dotted line guidelines;  ... maybe handy for those who are happy to follow instructions and not have to think for themselves;  ... but for me, more like 'just one option' to consider and always looking outside the dotted line for more interesting and alternative options.

Funny thing is, in more recent years, I've worked in overly regulated government departments and agencies and, although I was there to lead change and drive new thinking, in hindsight it wasn't a good fit for my 'outside-the-box' explorations, as I had to work hard to constantly find another way under the radar of  the rules saying 'NO'. It was like being pushed down into a way-to-small box which they had trouble keeping the lid on. I escaped several years ago; ... there is no passion in playing small.

So, you could say I have an inquiring mind and a thirst for 'what else'.  Yes, I'm a keen observer, I have a need to know why,  I like learning new things, I like to make sense of the stuff that happens in and around my world, and I like exploring options. So what? Hardly a unique concept; lots of people are like that you say?  

Well, here's the thing: ... I'm also one of those weird people who generally answers her own WHY questions ... pretty damn quickly [and sometimes out loud!]. I often go from WHY -> to why not -> to why not me -> to why not now; ... with a level of decisiveness that I see many others struggle with. How do I do that? I believe it's because over the years of observing and asking so many WHY's, I have become very clear on my own WHY

Knowing your WHY is about being clear on your purpose in life ... 

  • your core values
  • your beliefs
  • your aspirations and goals
  • your drivers, and ...
  • your choices.  
When you have this inner strength that clarity of purpose brings, then making decisions is easy as the self-doubt is smashed; ... and because the answers are within YOU ... always.  It's about removing the fears that stop you in your tracks and block your progress; ... knowing you can trust your gut instincts, and responding in a way that is right for you; ... that fits with your purpose in life.

I often see people holding themselves back at meetings or in work groups, as they are afraid of asking a 'stupid' question. Stop worrying about what others may think of you or trying to impress them.  Be YOU.  Your questions matter. They are not stupid questions. Stupid people are the ones who don't ask questions ... and follow blindly.

So next time you have to make an important decision, or are in that meeting observing something puzzling, thinking about lots of stuff and have a million WHY questions coming up for you; ... don't just sit there and play small.  Think about YOUR WHY, your purpose for being there,  and what you need to know to reach an informed decision.

Know your WHY ... get clear on your purpose in life ... the world has enough followers.

If you need help with finding that clarity of purpose in your life, engage a Life / Leadership Coach ... I would be happy to help or refer you to someone who can assist you. 

That is one of the reasons I have started this blog spot - DARE TO BE ...  because the purpose of my life is: 
" ... to be the passionate, genuine, 'out there', full version of my unique self ... to lead, influence and inspire others to grow to be the greatest version of themselves, and to make a difference in changing unresourceful thinking in others and the broader community."

Stay tuned for Part 2 - WHY NOT?

Written by Jilinda Lee - Change Champion Coach

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